5.And so I decided to leave.

                                                 THE UNKNOWN RELATION

                                         5.And I decided to leave

Regardless of all the unsorted feelings of Kartik we both decided to move in together. But as it was the life of Miss Kavya Mathur there came one more twist. Me and Kartik confessed our feelings and so we were in a kind of relationship, a relation without any commitment but full of promises, care and love. Meanwhile we were sharing ‘The Unknown Relation’ things became more complicated than it was before because now we were neither friends nor more, we were somewhere in between. Everything was just going with an ease but we both suffered from a blunder of emotional traumas. Kartik was all going good with his career and I was all up to achieve mine. Our emotional life never interfered our individual lives and that was something I liked more.

One fine day I decided to tell Kartik about my past life that was highlighted with Raj. I was afraid, I was nervous because in this time period Kartik was more onto me. His love was evolving day by day and here I was just smiling feeling sad inside that I couldn’t help him to categories his feeling. In that time the time came to let him know about my past. Anyhow I prepared myself to speak up everything to him but before that I wanted to know what Raj was doing with his life because he was one of the important person in my life. His number was deleted from my contact book and so managed it from someone mutual. I contacted him, we talked, we met and enjoyed the things all again. The ice cream treats, the bike ride, the gol gappa challenge everything. I found my friend again. Everything was going all good. But a day came that changed things in me. Raj, the one whom I trusted was actually the game player. That day I got to know that Raj was not only dating me but someone else too. Along with me he had someone else in his life or we say double dating. After knowing this I was all in a blank state. I confronted him, we had a very long call conversation, about 2-3 hours we spoke out everything we had in us. From that day I started hating him and also I took a break from Kartik too as I needed some me time to cope up with one more tragedy. Raj just had one wish and that was to not hate him. He wanted to meet me and so we decided to meet for the very last time in our lives.

We met and our meeting went into an odd situation that everyone must have gone through while meeting their ex. I was no special so I also felt that awkwardness too. Our conversation started. Raj, “I am sorry for whatever I did.” I was again laughing as it was one of my habits to laugh when I had nothing to say. I reciprocated, “so this was the reason you left me saying you don’t want to be a friend. And I was feeling guilty that I did wrong to you.” Raj was about to speak but then went to buy a cigarette. I was again shocked that he started doing this too. I asked him, “when did you started this.” Raj, “ I don’t know, eventually it happened.” I was in no mood to ask further about his smoking habit. I asked him to start with his words and end it as fast as he could. Very nicely he portrait everything in few lines and said, “ I was obsessed with you and thought it as a love. And by the time, I found a good friend in you and also realized that keeping you with me will destroy both of us as you wanted to leave this city and my all life is here. So I decided to leave. I am sorry but please don’t hate me.”  I listened to his every word and without reciprocating I left.

After few more days passed, I called Kartik and asked him to meet. Without my saying he was all aware that something was going into my life. We met at our daily place, he put my hands into his, looked into my eyes and said, “ I know you. Until I won’t ask you 3 times you won’t utter a word.” I smiled with tears in my eyes and hugged him. I told him everything about Raj including every single day memories and all. He listened to me and just said, “ forgive him and you are a gem. No matter what happens you know I will choose to stay.” I loved it, I felt like I was all healed when he wrapped me in his arms and kissed me on forehead after finishing his words.  Me and Kartik always had this bond of being together no matter how much we fought or hated  each other, we always ended up being together.

Me and Kartik were again back in The Unknown Relation. But as I said before we were going through many complications. Kartik was all puzzled with his feelings of love, obsession, attraction and blablaa. We were going through many fights, many silent days and many unsaid words were growing in between us. He started going on breaks without saying anything and I used to think of these stuffs more and more but with the time his behavior stopped affecting me as I was all used to it. He used to go and come back with all calm mood but as things couldn’t go the way he wanted. I stopped reacting and got engaged with my own life. I applied for a course of journalism and for a job in my dream city Pune. My hard work and Kartik’ s back stand paid all well and I got admission in Pune along with the job I applied for. Kartik and I again lost the contact because of his on and off moody treats. Everytime I used to let him deal and held him more tightly but that time I lost all of my patience and didn’t try to know what was going into his head. I achieved my life’s best thing I achieved what I dreamed but I couldn’t tell him. Without saying him anything and without waving him the last goodbye I decided to leave the city Delhi and he was all unaware. I decided to leave all of me in the old city as Kartik was everything to me.The decision was not easy for me but was only the option I was left with. I was all set to leave the city, I  chose to leave him with many questions unanswered as he himself didn’t have any answers to those questions.

                                                                                                                             

                                                                                                                            TO BE CONTINUED.